Miscellaneous 

Should you talk during a separation?

Leia Doyle

Should you talk during a separation?

If you are separated, it is very important to keep open communication with your spouse. But because you are apart, it is easy to let the poor communication that contributed to the decision to separate evolve into no communication at all. And without good, open communication, most separations culminate in divorce.

How do you start a conversation with a separation?

Lead with what you want the discussion to be about. You could say, “I don’t think we’ve been in the same place lately, and I feel us growing apart. I’d like to discuss the possibility of a trial separation.” Don’t be afraid to talk about what you’re feeling.

How do you talk about temporary separation?

8 Tips for a Trial Separation:

  1. Be specific, honest, and vulnerable about your concerns and what the break will look like.
  2. Set boundaries and expectations.
  3. Make an agreement to have regular therapy sessions.
  4. Don’t assume that your partner wants the same things that you do.

How do you deal with unexpected separation?

Coping With Separation And Divorce

  1. Recognize that it’s OK to have different feelings.
  2. Give yourself a break.
  3. Don’t go through this alone.
  4. Take care of yourself emotionally and physically.
  5. Avoid power struggles and arguments with your spouse or former spouse.
  6. Take time to explore your interests.
  7. Think positively.

How do I talk to my separated wife?

QUESTION: How do you talk to your partner when THEY want a separation and YOU don’t?

  1. DON’T discredit your spouse’s point of view.
  2. DO keep in mind that a series of shorter conversations will be necessary, especially in the beginning.
  3. DO take breaks, often.
  4. DON’T tell your spouse, “You are too upset now.

How do you tell your spouse you want a separation?

You should state your desires firmly and be direct, but also show respect and kindness towards your spouse in your discussions. This is not the best time to catalogue all the reasons your spouse “caused” this separation and you should not approach the conversation with anger.

How long is too long to be separated?

The time should ideally be between three and six months so a sense of urgency and sincerity is retained, especially where children are involved. The longer the separation continues, as people settle into their new routine, the harder it is to get back to the old life.

Why does separation hurt so much?

If the decision to end the relationship wasn’t yours, there might be feelings of rejection, insecurities, low self-esteem, low self-confidence and vulnerability. Going through a breakup is experiencing real loss, and the bigger the love, the connection and the intimacy, the bigger the pain and suffering.